Oh yes!
Mood:  silly
Now Playing: In Those Jeans - Ginuwine


I just overheard Little Boss telling our receptionist this:

LB: Britney, the burrito I bought for lunch, is now ice cold and I would like to finish it before it begins to rot. So could you please if anybody else calls for me, put them straight to my voicemail.

Britney: Sure, um, ok.

I can understand wanting to finish lunch while it's still hot. I very much appreciate a nice hot lunch, who doesn't right?

What I'm wondering about is the need to tell the poor girl the state of his burrito. Did that really need to be expressed? I'm guessing Britney doesn't give a rats ass if his lunch is cold or not.

I'd Like That In Writing Please
Mood:  incredulous
Now Playing: Tilt Ya Head Back - Nelly

Little boss wanted me to type up a change order for an account we're working on today. This is the discussion that took place when he got me on the intercom.

"Princess, can you type this up for me? It's blah blah blah, yada yada yada, blah blah blah, yada yada yada."

"Little boss, can you please give that to me in writing please. That's too much for me to write down right now. I'm in the middle of programming a panel."

"Sure thing Princess, I'll bring that in to you in a minute"

"Thanks Little boss"

So about five minutes later he walks into my office and asks me,

"So, are you ready to write this down?"

W T F?

Did you not hear me? Was I speaking Chinese? What the hell happened in the span of five minutes that you forgot that I asked YOU to put it in writing and then I would type up the correct form.

Why me? Does anyone else have this problem?

And that's because?
Mood:  lazy
Now Playing: Stacy's Mom - Fountains of Wayne

I don't know about any of you, but I started staying home by myself around 8 years old. Sure, things were vastly different than they are today. People and predators are bolder and there is much more trouble kids can get into. But what I don't understand for the life of me is why a 14 year old high school freshman can't get herself home and stay home until her mom can get off work.

My boss seems to be of the mind that she can't leave her children alone. She leaves early because her children only have half day or she picks them up from school, but can't come back to the office. There are times when she is needed here and isn't around because she just HAD to go pick up her daughter or son.

When I was a freshman in high school I either rode the bus home or, horrror or horrors, I rode my bike! It's shocking, I know. To think that we might potentially teach a child a little self sufficiency and responsibility is just too much for me to bear. What ever happened to helping your kids became worth while adults instead of sniveling little brats that can't do anything for themselves and live with mommy and daddy until they're 35.

Sure, there are special circumstances in certain case. However, why oh why, can't these children get themselves home, or simply be dropped off?

I've come to the point where I've decided to start looking for a new job. I've had enough of being bossed around by an arrogant, snot nosed little brat and his equally pompous father. It would be ok if my work were recognized and appreciated, but there has never been so much as a simple thank you. I make good money here, but the cons outweigh the pros at this point and I need to find myself a way to be more available for my kids and a little more freedom for me and my family.

There is only so much headbanging and teeth gnashing one can do and I think I've done enough. But never fear, no matter where you go or what you do, there will always be an asshole to rant about.

Can't you tell him?
Mood:  irritated
Now Playing: Let Me Blow Your Mind - Eve

Unbelievbale! Little boss was in a hurry so he could make it home in time to go to the car show with big boss, so he asks me to finish his phone call. I sat at my desk stunned. He can't finish a two minute conversation and then leave? He's going with his dad for pete's sake! I'm sure big boss will wait for little boss. Oh yeah, little boss left early so he could go to the car show. But it's work related because they're going to look at new work trucks.

Now pardon me, I may be just a silly girl, but when you look at a work truck, don't you go to a dealership? At car shows all they show are concept cars and cars that have been all tricked out. Not utility vehicles. Just who are they trying to kid? Me, that's who.

So back to the point. He was on the phone with a customer and the customer wanted to add something to his account. So little boss asks me if I can take care of that, but I'm on the phone myself and don't see why little boss can't handle his own phone call. "Why can't you just ask him what he wants" he says. Because you snot nosed little brat, it's not my job and because you're perfectly capable of finding out what it is the guy wants and handling it yourself. Just because big boss bought tickets to a car show and wants you to go with him, doesn't mean you get to dump all your stuff on me so you can leave early. So no, I can't tell him what he wants to know.

Ever wonder why?
Mood:  quizzical
Now Playing: Lala - Ashlee Simpson (sometimes cable radio sucks)
Do you ever wonder why they call it working? Why do you say "I'm going to work"?

I have a theory, please indulge me. It's because you're supposed to be WORKING! You are given money to arrive at a destination and do what the person that gets paid more than you tells you to do.

Granted the last couple of weeks have been pretty relaxed with the holidays and all, but the holidays are over now. Merry christmas and happy new year. Now get your butt back to work!

Please, do not:

-break up with your boyfriend on the phone

-call your now ex-boyfriend and beg him to come back

-make pro and con lists for your ex-boyfriend and your workout partner so you can decide which hunk of meat you really want

-come in and give me all the dirty details as though what is going on in your life makes some sort of difference in mine. (yes, I know that's mean, but if you knew how many times this woman has broken up and gotten back together with this horses' ass she calls a boyfriend in the last month, you would be a little mean too)

-bring in your adult type gifts and show them off to every body. (yes, she brought in the edible undies that she intended to give to one of the young men in the running for her affections)


It's all about learning to seperate your personal life from your professional life. I know you're young, but you're a smart girl and I'm sure deep down you know what you're doing is inapropriate for the office.

#50 - Wow!
Mood:  celebratory
Now Playing: Naughty Girl - Beyonce
Wow, I can't believe I've made it to 50 posts. I impress myself.

When I came in to the office this morning my favority co-worker had at least twelve framed pictures set up on the spare desk in the dispatch room. They were facing the door, so clearly she wanted somebody to see them and come talk to her about them. Naughty me, I avoided that room like the plague until I knew she was leaving.

I know she's just proud of her daughter, but if I go in there I'll be there for at least half an hour and I got's work to do. I'm not going to be at work next week since the kiddies are out of school.

Everybody have a merry Christmas and get lots of good presents, eat too much, and veg out in front of the tv snuggled up with a loved one.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

I sense impending doom
Mood:  don't ask
Now Playing: Green Christmas - Barenaked Ladies

Ok, I know you're coming home from your vacation and you're all excited and happy, but I don't need to hear the details. I really don't. I'm so incredibly sorry, cause I know you want me to sit and listen to you recount every little detail, but in case you haven't noticed, Christmas is only 4 days away!!!! And I have stuff to do lady! Cookies and a cake to bake! Presents to wrap! I'm a whirling dervish of Christmas cheer by golly!

Not that I don't care that you had a wonderful visit and I'm happy for. But when I ask, because the manners are genetically programmed, how your trip went, just say it was great and you had a lovely visit and leave it at that. Don't torture my cornea's with pictures of people I don't know and will never see. I don't need to see every single gift you received and hear about every restaurant you ate at and on which day.

Sorry to go on about this folks, but she drives me up the wall. She's a nice lady, she really is, but daaaaaaaaaamn she talks a lot!

How do you say . . . .
Mood:  incredulous
Now Playing: Forgot about Dre - Eminem

How do you say to someone, "I think you over estimate your importance here. We are capable of stocking the envelopes by ourselves. We can put our timecards on Sharon's desk, we have forgotten on what day the pay period ends. Your projects are not really yours, you just think they are."

"Please, anal self-important co-worker, take a step back and realize that you are really driving me up a wall side ways. Really. You're a nice lady and all, and you do do somethings that my fellow co-workers just can't do. But, just because you've gone on vacation does not mean that you need to stock everything as though the apocolypse was about to occur. I promise, we will still be alive and operational when you get back.

I know this is really going to stick in your craw deary, but we just hired a lovely young lady to replace Frank the eyeliner wearing, fingernail painting swing shift guy, cause he's decided the land of Starbuck's is much more suited to his lifestyle. And guess what, we're going to start training her without you. Yes! We are vile evil little co-workers and while you're away we're going to fart rainbows and throw a party, cause we don't have you here to write us a list of things we don't need to do."


Thank you, I feel much better now. I do. You have no idea how long I've been holding that in.

Update and WTF?
Mood:  not sure
Now Playing: Tempted To Touch - Rupee
The new girl is still fabulous. Very willing to learn and help out. I think she will work out great. She's very nice and the guys think she is quite something as well. I work with mostly men, and let me tell you. It's a good thing I'm an open minded gal and I'm not easily offended, casue Lord have mercy the things they're saying about her! All complimentary of course, but in a recently divorced lonely male sort of way. It is pretty funny to listen to them and I guess it's nice that they think they can be themselves around me.

I saw commercial this morning, for a personal hair trimmer. You know what I mean by PERSONAL hair trimmer. Jena's Hot Trimmer to be exact. The commercial came on at 7am this morning, I think the channel was Bravo, but still even on cable, I would think that that sort of commerical would be for late night only. Jena, as in Jena Jameson, porn star and yes, I know who she is and yes I have watched porn. Very boring, why watch when you could be doing?

"Why have just a bikini line, when you could have a design?" I'm all for having things be neat and tidy down there, but why in the hell would you want a heart or arrow or X design in your pelvic region? What the heck is THAT all about? And why was it on at 7am?

I'm getting close to 50 posts on tripod! Wow! Who knew this blogging thing would last?

The New Girl
Mood:  energetic
Now Playing: Oye Mi Canto - Norega
The new girl "Britney" started today. I'm gonna be nice and not use her real name like I did with Ethel.

Britney is a genius, and I mean that. She is great, wonderful, fabulous! She has caught on so incredibly quick that by next week, I can begin giving her work to do and I might actually see my desk again some time soon.

She's already re-typing stuff and is already sitting the dispatch chair. I love it! My only worry is that she'll get bored and want to find another job.