I sense impending doom
Mood:  don't ask
Now Playing: Green Christmas - Barenaked Ladies

Ok, I know you're coming home from your vacation and you're all excited and happy, but I don't need to hear the details. I really don't. I'm so incredibly sorry, cause I know you want me to sit and listen to you recount every little detail, but in case you haven't noticed, Christmas is only 4 days away!!!! And I have stuff to do lady! Cookies and a cake to bake! Presents to wrap! I'm a whirling dervish of Christmas cheer by golly!

Not that I don't care that you had a wonderful visit and I'm happy for. But when I ask, because the manners are genetically programmed, how your trip went, just say it was great and you had a lovely visit and leave it at that. Don't torture my cornea's with pictures of people I don't know and will never see. I don't need to see every single gift you received and hear about every restaurant you ate at and on which day.

Sorry to go on about this folks, but she drives me up the wall. She's a nice lady, she really is, but daaaaaaaaaamn she talks a lot!

How do you say . . . .
Mood:  incredulous
Now Playing: Forgot about Dre - Eminem

How do you say to someone, "I think you over estimate your importance here. We are capable of stocking the envelopes by ourselves. We can put our timecards on Sharon's desk, we have forgotten on what day the pay period ends. Your projects are not really yours, you just think they are."

"Please, anal self-important co-worker, take a step back and realize that you are really driving me up a wall side ways. Really. You're a nice lady and all, and you do do somethings that my fellow co-workers just can't do. But, just because you've gone on vacation does not mean that you need to stock everything as though the apocolypse was about to occur. I promise, we will still be alive and operational when you get back.

I know this is really going to stick in your craw deary, but we just hired a lovely young lady to replace Frank the eyeliner wearing, fingernail painting swing shift guy, cause he's decided the land of Starbuck's is much more suited to his lifestyle. And guess what, we're going to start training her without you. Yes! We are vile evil little co-workers and while you're away we're going to fart rainbows and throw a party, cause we don't have you here to write us a list of things we don't need to do."


Thank you, I feel much better now. I do. You have no idea how long I've been holding that in.

Update and WTF?
Mood:  not sure
Now Playing: Tempted To Touch - Rupee
The new girl is still fabulous. Very willing to learn and help out. I think she will work out great. She's very nice and the guys think she is quite something as well. I work with mostly men, and let me tell you. It's a good thing I'm an open minded gal and I'm not easily offended, casue Lord have mercy the things they're saying about her! All complimentary of course, but in a recently divorced lonely male sort of way. It is pretty funny to listen to them and I guess it's nice that they think they can be themselves around me.

I saw commercial this morning, for a personal hair trimmer. You know what I mean by PERSONAL hair trimmer. Jena's Hot Trimmer to be exact. The commercial came on at 7am this morning, I think the channel was Bravo, but still even on cable, I would think that that sort of commerical would be for late night only. Jena, as in Jena Jameson, porn star and yes, I know who she is and yes I have watched porn. Very boring, why watch when you could be doing?

"Why have just a bikini line, when you could have a design?" I'm all for having things be neat and tidy down there, but why in the hell would you want a heart or arrow or X design in your pelvic region? What the heck is THAT all about? And why was it on at 7am?

I'm getting close to 50 posts on tripod! Wow! Who knew this blogging thing would last?

The New Girl
Mood:  energetic
Now Playing: Oye Mi Canto - Norega
The new girl "Britney" started today. I'm gonna be nice and not use her real name like I did with Ethel.

Britney is a genius, and I mean that. She is great, wonderful, fabulous! She has caught on so incredibly quick that by next week, I can begin giving her work to do and I might actually see my desk again some time soon.

She's already re-typing stuff and is already sitting the dispatch chair. I love it! My only worry is that she'll get bored and want to find another job.

I don't have time
Mood:  sad
Now Playing: Hey Yah - Outkast
So, I went for my follow up appointment with my doctor to discuss my lab work that was part of my yearly physical.

Turns out, I'm not actually diabetic, but I might as well be. I guess my blood sugar level is right on the border line of being diabetic. I'm also having some problems with my liver and I now have high blood pressure. Lovely, lovely.

All of these problems are as a result of being overweight. My doctor said some people can be fat and handle, I can't. If I don't begin to lose weight soon, and I mean very soon. I will be having MAJOR health problems. The interesting thing is, I'm not what doctors consider obese. I'm not 100lbs. overweight. But pretty darn close to it.

So, I'm supposed to walk or eventually be able to walk four miles a day and do circut training twice a week. And here is the kicker, no sugar, or as little as possible. Merry Christmas to me, no fudge or cookies, or pies. Shame on me really, for sitting on my butt and for not keeping the pie out of my pie hole.

But, the silver lining in all of this is that I now have no choice but to get up of my rather large booty and turn myself into a Baywatch babe. My hubby seems a little worried about all this and I think he's been secretly sabotaging me in all my previous diet attempts. When I tried the Atkins diet a couple of years ago, three weeks into it, for Valentine's day he bought me a two pound box of Godiva chocolates. Hmmmmmm. His girlfriend before he met me, was not overweight when he met her, but weighed I'd say pretty close to 300 pounds when they broke up. I see a pattern forming, don't you?

Anyhoo, it sucks that this happened right before the holidays, but as my doctor told me, "some people have time to take care of things like this and can take the whole getting healthy thing at their leisure, you don't have time, you need to start on this right now". Scary, very scary.

My Grandma died from complications from being diabetic and was on dialysis (sp?) for several years and finally one day just gave up. She chose to quit dialysis. She was really tired and I won't even go into all the complications she was having and I guess if I had been her, I would have done the same thing. She died three days after stopping the dialysis, she was 62 years old. I was really close to her and it was really hard to watch my champion die when I was so young myself, just 9 years old. She stood up for me when nobody else would, but that's a whole other story.

So to make this very long story short, I can't put myself and my family through something that awful again and my kids deserve a healthy mom to chase after them and beat them with a wooden spoon. That last part is a joke people. I have a hard time spanking my son and an even harder time spanking my daughter. But I would like to live well into my 90's and enjoy being a grumpy old woman and poke people with my cane.

My Favorite Things
Mood:  happy
Now Playing: Give A Little Bit - GooGoo Dolls

I think this is becoming a trend, so here is my contribution.


Yankee Candles - I know there are other candles out there that are as strongly scented, but what can I say? I'm a candle snob. My favorite scent right now is Home Sweet Home, also Clean Cotton is really nice.

Fluffy pillows - lots of them. I'm a total pillow hog.

Warm fluffy blankets - to go with the fluffy pillows, duh!

My children's soft little cheeks - the ones on their face people! Get your minds out of the gutter!

Reservations for dinner - who doesn't like those right?

Be Good to Your Daughters - song by John Mayer, I think it's absolutely true and couldn't agree more.

My Diary of Alicia Keys CD - damn that woman can sing and play the piano. I wish I could sing like that.

Janet Evanovich books - if you haven't read them, you should. You'll laugh your ass off.

George Carlin - ok he's a person, but he's one of my favorite people

Blogs - I must say that blogs are one of my newer favorite things, but I'm so glad I started.

I thing I could probably go on and on and you would eventually quit reading. What are your favorite things?

Christmas Decorations
Mood:  special
Now Playing: White Flag - Dido
I hauled the four giant tubs of Christmas decorations into the house yesterday and started going through all my stuff, just to see what I had and where I might want to put things. This is our first Christmas that we aren't living in an apartment, so we actually get to put lights up on our house. My hubby is beside himself. He stood outside for an hour debating and deciding how he'll decorate the outside.

My son asked if it was Christmas day because of all the Christmas we were putting up. I want to make a paper chain or get an advent calendar so he can count the days until Christmas.

My daughter and I went to Target on Saturday so she could spend the money her Grandpa gave her. She actually went up and down the isles in the toy department and pointed out all the toys she wanted for Christmas. She wants everything for Christmas. If she wasn't three and would actually know that she's not really going to get all that for Christmas, I might feel bad that she would be in for a crushing disappointment.

I'm going to start my baking this weekend since I did manage to get my house in order last weekend.

We had a great turkey day visiting with all our family and the kids totally wore themselves out. My fil visited and had a really good time.

Happy Thanksgiving
Mood:  celebratory
Now Playing: Smells like Thanksgiving
Ethel was fired today.

A moment of silence please for Ethel. She drove me crazy and boggled my mind, but it's a shame she didn't work out. She was a nice lady. I don't think she was even going to say goodbye to me, if I hadn't turned around when I did, she would have just left. Perhaps she wasn't wild about me either. I hope she finds another job soon.

I hope everybody has a good weekend and eats lots of turkey. We're going to my hubby's uncle's house and the fil is visiting, whoopeee! I'm real excited about the fil visiting let me tell ya'. About as excited as I would be about having my hair set on fire.

Yeah, nothing says painfully long weekend like, "honey, my dad's going to visit for Thanksgiving!" If I drink a lot maybe he'll just think I'm really into celebrating.

I'm gonna shop til I drop Friday morning. I did it last year and had a blast! Even though stores were really crowded, people were really nice and helpful. And I got some damn good deals too!

Weekend
Mood:  party time!
Now Playing: TGIF
Ethel's last day will be next Wednesday. Happy Thanksgiving Ethel! Jeez, I thought my boss wouldn't fire her right before the holiday, but it's her perogative.

I hope everybody has a good weekend. I'm going to get my house in shape as my FIL is coming to visit for Turkey Day and I need to start my holiday baking.

Ethel Update - Week #2
Mood:  d'oh
Now Playing: I never really loved you, I just drank too much
Ethel has completed her second week of training and I have become convinced that she knows less than she did when she started. Oy vey! She's giving me a headache. Ok, so she's gotten better at answering the phones, but that's about it. At this rate it'll be six months before she's up to speed.

Ok, enough complaining about poor Ethel. It's all I seem to talk/blog about lately. Probably because she's driving me insane. She's one of those people that if you're having a conversation with somebody else in the same room, she has to say something. Not that I was trying to be rude and exclude her, but holy cow! I was talking about something with my other co-worker and Ethel kept saying stuff that was totally off the subject, but clearly trying to work her way in. Sorry, but I'm 27 and Ethel is like 68, we don't have much in common.

So, anyhoo lots of fun. Getting ready for Thanksgiving. Hopefully hubby's co. will give us another check for a turkey this year. This will be our first Thanksgiving in our house instead of an apartment. We'll also be getting ready to go to Disneyland in the first two weeks of December and then Christmas and New Year's and then my birthday. It seems far away, but it's creeping up on me. I feel like I should be baking or basting something. Maybe wrapping something in foil.

On my drive home I saw somebody had already put their christmas lights up. Please, I haven't even taken my Halloween decorations down yet! I'm so lame, usually my Christmas decorations don't come down until it's almost my birthday . . . in February. Last year though I did manage to get the dead tree out of the house before the 31st. January 31st.

My boss returns from her trip to Hawaii tomorrow, so we'll see what happens with Ethel. I'll be sure to update everyone. Cause I know you're just waitin' around to find out.